Yes, "that space". You know it. It pops up everywhere. It's "that space" between being almost done and actually being done - that place where you want quit because you just know you can't do it. "That space" pops up in 90 minutes of yoga everyday. I hit rabbit and I'm positively sure I can't make it three more postures to spine twist. It pops up in a two month long period of illustrating a children's book. I get the book laid out. I make a thumbnail map. I sketch the hero. I begin the thumbnails, do three, and decide maybe I can't complete this when I think of turning each thumbnail into a major work of art. It pops up in a two-year long ordeal of detaching with love in a relationship that no longer fits. I go weeks doing well, then the tug of war between me and God starts. I wrestle it all back, begin to doubt myself, and give it back to God, only to start again in a few weeks time. Whether it's 90 minutes, 2 months, or 2 years, that space always shows up. Yes, I know you know "that space".
What I have recently figured out about being in "that space" is that's the place they're talking about in all those inspirational quotes that that tell you to push through when your back is against the wall. In the new music video by The Script that I saw this morning, it is the place where the dancer puts her forehead against the mirror, almost succumbing to the odds of a deaf girl becoming a prima ballerina. When I end up in "that space", it's an ah..ha moment for me - sooooo....that's "the space" they meant.
Examining "that space" changed my attitude when I'm in it. Instead of more moaning and groaning about how I cannot do this one more minute, I stop and feel it and think that THIS is the exact time all that inspiration is talking about. THIS is how it feels. Now - stop the pity party and push on through. Get through those last three poses, even if they are not perfect. Draw that next picture - keep in mind it doesn't have to be used. Let go of taking back control, playing the victim, and manipulation and let God deal with it by attending to and participating in all the new blessings He brings to my life everyday.
Feel that space. Move through it. Don't get stuck there. Finish. It'd be great to finish strong, but for now, just finishing will do. Meeting a goal is great, but how it has changed your very core by the time spent in "that space" is the essence of the journey.
And so, as a other day goes by, I love saying, "So this is what they meant", it is a sign of new growth, and....I have written.